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eek2121 , in active buff

Pro Tip: If you are an attractive female and are at the gym, find a guy busting his ass (lifting weights, doing cardio, etc), preferably by himself (not with “the guys” or trying to impress anyone), and tell him you think he is doing great and that he looks great. Then walk away.

You will likely make his day. This will work even if he is gay.

SubArcticTundra ,
@SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml avatar

Yes but then he’ll instantly fall for you

superduperenigma ,

Pro tip: if you are even a somewhat average looking woman and are remotely nice to or smile in the general direction of a man, there is a very real possibility that he will decide you’re flirting with him and get uncomfortably creepy and refuse to take any hints to the contrary.

Llewellyn ,

But what if you are really unattractive one? Should you leverage it for motivation by the opposite approach and yell: work harder you lazy sack!

PixeIOrange , in The Oven Dilemma

Ive left on one oven plate over night one time. I had luck nothing stood on it. Now i never stack anything on them, i think this is a huge improvement safetywise.

SpaceNoodle ,

Do you mean stove burner?

smeg , in Implement Gapless Playback FFS

Last time I saw this joke posted it wasn’t as family friendly as saying “between Netflix episodes”

sabreW4K3 OP ,
@sabreW4K3@lemmy.tf avatar

😂

Kyoyeou , in The Oven Dilemma

You created enough doubt in my to get me out of bed when I should sleep

It was off :(

sabreW4K3 OP ,
@sabreW4K3@lemmy.tf avatar

😂

fckreddit , in Fun Fact: In Britain All Our Plates Are Edible

The food looks so unappetizing. The plate looks edible by comparison.

OmegaMouse ,
@OmegaMouse@feddit.uk avatar

The gravy looks so thin and watery 🤢

FooBarrington ,

Not surprising. Notice how there is no cup on the table? It’s tea.

Suppoze ,
@Suppoze@beehaw.org avatar

Yeah, what is that anyway? I see some meat maybe, some sauce, some sad onions… but no idea

Byereddithellolemmy , in Members Of S Club 7 Over Time

Looks wrong, one of them died.

Zozano ,

S Club 6

MrGerrit , in The Only Dick Pic I Want To Receive
bizzle , in Fun Fact: In Britain All Our Plates Are Edible
@bizzle@midwest.social avatar

In Britain, the food is barely edible.

sabreW4K3 OP ,
@sabreW4K3@lemmy.tf avatar

Does America even have food?

MentallyExhausted ,

If there is one thing America is good at it, it’s getting fat.

bizzle ,
@bizzle@midwest.social avatar

Braindead take, America is #1 in obesity

cantstopthesignal , in Your Crumpet My Crumpet

Little known fact that crumpets were invented as a butter serving tray for British aristocrats.

uphillbothways ,
@uphillbothways@kbin.social avatar

Honestly, always thought they were just a way to use up sourdough stater that has to be gotten rid of in the course of maintenance.

rbesfe , in Your Crumpet My Crumpet

Swap the butter for peanut butter. Thank me later.

blackn1ght ,

Add some strawberry jam and I’m sold.

sabreW4K3 OP ,
@sabreW4K3@lemmy.tf avatar

What on Earth? Peanut butter on crumpets? Banned!

rich ,

Butter and marmite or nothin

sabreW4K3 OP ,
@sabreW4K3@lemmy.tf avatar

You’re gross 🤢😭

fakeman_pretendname ,

I tried this earlier, and actually, it’s pretty good, thanks. I don’t know why I’d not considered it, given that it works on toast, and all carbohydrate bases are interchangeable.

Not as good as covering it in cheese and melting it, but pretty high on the list :)

Anticorp , in Your Crumpet My Crumpet

We are not the same

TimeMuncher2 , in Fun Fact: In Britain All Our Plates Are Edible

Won't that bread soak up the liquid and break apart?
Looks like a race - will the plate break apart first or you finish the food first.

Mane25 ,

It’s not bread, there’s no bread in that picture.

forcequit , in Priorities

gross

rich ,

Yeah I’d prefer the one on the left too

tsonfeir , in Friday night fun
@tsonfeir@lemm.ee avatar

Single mom is very specific. Is it the kids that turn you on?

EmpatheticTeddyBear ,

It may be a reference to a pattern I noticed when I was still dating. I noticed that it was usually (greater than 50%) the single moms that were the most daring, willing to explore, kinky, etc cetera, in the bedroom. It might have been because being a single parent (speaking as a formerly single father) doesn’t afford a lot of spare time and on top of that, there are a lot of people not willing to date anyone with a child. So sometimes you are just very excited to have someone interested in you and are willing to go the distance even if it might not be the cat’s meow.

tsonfeir ,
@tsonfeir@lemm.ee avatar

I’m so desperate for attention that I’ll let a man, seeking only desperate women with children, tongue my asshole while his cat watches

I’m down for a good rimmy, but keep the kids out of it. And the cat.

billy_bollocks ,

Want to add - there are a ton of hot single moms out there. No need to throw them any extra shade

Try knocking up a stripper if you want to step up your game. You’ll leave with quite a few memories and maybe even a few scars

BROMETHIUS ,

No way. Are you telling me there are hot single moms in my area?

0000000nowhere ,

The prophecy is true

Emperor ,
@Emperor@feddit.uk avatar

And, lo, it came to pass that on the 25th day of the eighth month of the year of our lord 2023…

Pregnenolone ,

This question is hella cursed

Son_of_dad ,

Single moms are my bread and butter. They’re super into it, they have no time for bullshit, they just wanna go. If you’re going for the right single moms you won’t ever even meet the kids.

tsonfeir ,
@tsonfeir@lemm.ee avatar

Your username isn’t helping me get away from this being a little creepy.

BROMETHIUS ,

He must be the right single dad

pimento64 ,

Maybe he’s just not obsessed with pedophilia, weirdo

Emperor ,
@Emperor@feddit.uk avatar

It feels like I’ve stumbled across a letters page from Razzle that some kind soul has stuffed in a hedge

Waraugh ,

Married moms are even better. Last three gals I’ve ‘dated’ have been married. As a single father with full custody I get the time to focus on my kids, never have to worry about the whole meeting the kids conversation, and an hour or two a few times a week, usually during work (I work from home), is the perfect amount of time to spend with someone especially when none of it needs to be about stupid shit, they got some loser cuc at home to bitch at.

Guitarist , in Priorities

🐪🦶

Zorque ,

Dromedary soul?

Emperor ,
@Emperor@feddit.uk avatar

It’s hump foot.

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