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RIP_Cheems ,
@RIP_Cheems@lemmy.world avatar

Free gravel and can speak khitan. You can sell the gravel for money and you can say just about anything and no one will get mad at you cause no one will understand you.

badaboomxx ,

For me 2 and 7.

smackjack ,

3 could save your life if you get trapped inside your car.

Moc ,

Or if you’re handcuffed or in prison

raspberriesareyummy ,

On a more likely note: It will be insanely easy to get dressed / undressed in the mornings/evenings. Just need to find a way to keep your clothes “inflated” when you “exit” them, so that you can teleport back into them. Although, would need to find a way to change the underwear inside the “standing” pants… Or go commando :D

profoundninja ,

3 is amazing. You could literally do the anime “disappear and instantly close distance” thing.

curiousaur ,

Knowing containers are empty can be valuable.

smackjack ,

A reverse loot detector.

raspberriesareyummy ,

Monty Hall instant win :)

LostWon ,

Depending on how fast the teleport is, whether there’s a delay between uses and whether it causes significant fatigue or other side effects, I might take that. Other than that, it’s a toss-up for me between the extinct language and communicating with oysters.

ikidd ,
@ikidd@lemmy.world avatar

#2 is a farmer’s wet dream.

Moebius ,

1 and 2, but really only 1. If I can talk to oysters then I can figure out how to grow black pearls better and make some serious cash. If the oysters decide they don’t want to help then I can sell gravel.

veniasilente ,

3 and 5 are a potentially broken combo. In particular if “control a toaster” means control and not just “operate”, since then it’s basically toasterkinesis, or being able to instantly turn any toaster into a bomb. "teleport up to 10 inches away sounds like it wouldn’t be too useful but it does, in principle, allow you to phase out incoming bullets and a fair amount of lateral blade hits if you time it right.

6 and 7 could have some interesting, niche uses in some fields. 6 for example could be used for intimidation if “10 hours younger” is interpreted chronologically: even after taking a serious wound, you’d look pristine for around 10 hours so it might be used to scare or distract some enemies.

I’m… not even sure what 4 or 9 could ever be used for.

RickRussell_CA ,
@RickRussell_CA@lemmy.world avatar

9 you could sell to a paraplegic

Corkyskog ,

1 & 7 or 2 & 7 rough choices.

With the oysters you could probably ascertain way more knowledge than you expected.

MeDuViNoX ,
@MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works avatar

They all just chant, “OYST! OYST! OYST!” forever like Pokemon.

pinkdrunkenelephants ,

3 and 5. I would wreak so much havoc, it’d be fucking great

ohlaph ,

What would you do with 5?

MeDuViNoX ,
@MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works avatar

Weld toasters to weapons of war and take over the world.

ohlaph ,

Okay, okay, calm down.

HW07 ,

Say some phrase in Khitan, then teleport. Become a world-famous magician as no one would believe you’re actually teleporting. The Khitan is for the show. Also drive all those people trying to debunk your trick insane.

Plus it’d be incredible for heists, there’s no mention of a cooldown so just spam it and piston-translocation glitch your way through some complex.

occhionaut ,

Careful. Do it too much and you’ll get gravgun-taken by the admins for a stern talking to.

captainjaneway ,

I’d pick teleport but I’m afraid of the splicing consequences.

I’d rather just see inside empty objects. I’m sure I could use this in some circumstances. Being able to “know” if a box is empty or not could be perceived as super natural. There is probably a lot of money in that. Plus, a lot of gambling opportunities in things like that cup game. What defines a container? That could change things.

Controlling any toaster with my mind is ambiguous. I’ll assume it only works on toasters with power. So I can only turn them on/off to make toast. I could use this power to destroy countries. Power draw of a toaster isn’t too bad, but every toaster being turned on at the same time might damage an energy sector. It would take a while to debug as well.

I like the free gravel.

I think I’d pick free gravel and… Seeing inside empty objects. Seems like the most profitable with the least chance of a monkeys paw.

Corkyskog ,

Everyone discounts oyster knowledge… But is the gravel unlimited? Like could I just demand 730,000 Tonnes of gravel tomorrow?

occhionaut ,

Weal, gravel be upon ye

looseanus ,

deek.chat

Emerald ,

Teleport and spam it. Go hundreds of miles an hour

hydrospanner ,

24 hour cool down on the teleport skill in the next balance patch.

captainjaneway ,

Totally nerfs that power. I’ll go with the free gravel.

RampantParanoia2365 ,

3 and 4: Fastest Bloodhound in the West

Here4CatPics ,

3 and 8

Then I can Time Warp to the past and become a king! Or holy figure

Wogi ,

You have died of dysentery

Here4CatPics ,

That’s fair

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