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NuWuX ,
@NuWuX@sh.itjust.works avatar

A gallon of blood, tampons, and a Popsicle kit.

Takios ,
@Takios@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

What Walmart sells blood?!

Jiggle_Physics ,

some sell blood in the meat department. This is only likely to be found in a place with a big population that uses it, commonly, in cooking.

NuWuX ,
@NuWuX@sh.itjust.works avatar

Ask for it special from the deli/meat section or settle for the fake stuff during Halloween, I guess?

Fedegenerate ,

Mop, wire coat hanger, pregnancy test.

Maggoty ,

Car battery

Jumper cables

Duct tape

If you get a bonus then bleach, lye, or tarp rounds it out. Have fun talking to the local police!

Michal ,

Duct tape, Rope, newspaper

Jiggle_Physics ,

I once bought 50 cans of butane. That caused a stir. Managers got involved, I was asked a whole bunch of questions about what I was doing, it was annoying.

Oh yeah, also had a similar experience with spray paint.

CarbonIceDragon ,
@CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social avatar

As a former cashier (grocery store not walmart admittedly, but I doubt things are that different), I dont think weird uses for the items are the way to go, the cashier is barely even going to notice or care what you’re buying. what I bring to freak out the cashier, are some item that needs ID to buy, some big heavy item with the barcode removed so that it will take a bunch of lifting and turning in a hopeless effort to find it before someone eventually has to go find another one and bring it over, and a propane refill if walmart does those (at my grocery store the process to go find a full one was a pain, especially in the winter since they were outside). Further, I try to buy these items with the help of a ton of expired and unexpired coupons mixed together, several gift cards, and a stubborn half-deaf old person who wont take no for an answer.

Mpatch ,

You are a fucking monster. The point of this was to have some laughs not cause a poor walmart employee to beat their spouse or off them selves. Damn you’re cruel.

CarbonIceDragon ,
@CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social avatar

Hey, it could always get worse. I could also specify that these items are purchased on a Sunday that a locally favored football team happens to be playing a game, during the rush of people buying snacks and soda.

AmosBurton_ThatGuy ,
@AmosBurton_ThatGuy@lemmy.ca avatar

ಠ_ಠ

ლ(ಠ益ಠლ)

┬──┬ ノ( ゜-゜ノ)

(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻)

Buddahriffic ,

Would it be more or less frustrating if instead of an old person, it’s a middle aged person who clearly doesn’t understand the language but keeps smiling and nodding as if you’re on the same page and any time you try to prompt for information, they encouragingly push their items towards you or try to pay you in a currency you don’t recognize?

dohpaz42 ,
@dohpaz42@lemmy.world avatar

I’m very disappointed. I couldn’t find any cardboard tubes at my local Walmart.

Anyway:

  1. Cardboard tube, at least 3” in diameter
  2. Gerbil food
  3. Candlesticks
swab148 ,
@swab148@lemm.ee avatar

Check in the party section, over by the office supplies. Wrapping paper makes great cardboard tubes.

Source: I, uh… saw it in a movie, yeah

dohpaz42 ,
@dohpaz42@lemmy.world avatar

The hero we deserve!

BrazenSigilos ,

Carrots Vegetable peeler Lube

spamspeicher ,

What’s a peeler lube? Or is it carrots vegetable?

programmer_belch ,
@programmer_belch@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

I’m going with the classic:

Pringles can

Gloves

Sponge

bobs_monkey ,

Going in dry I see

zalgotext ,

Once you pop, the fun don’t stop. Shit’s getting chafed up in this bitch

don ,

KY

inside out glove

couch

ValorieAF ,

Ah the old JD Vance

pineapplelover ,

What’s a KY?

don ,

Lube

zalgotext ,

Kentucky

Grayox ,
@Grayox@lemmy.ml avatar

Apples, razor blades, carmel

Dudewitbow ,

bleach, ammonia based cleaner, mixing container.

uh oh, accidental chloramine gas bomb

reminder people, do NOT mix bleach with ammonia based cleaners to “speed up cleaning”. youll accidentally speed up life

ryannathans ,

Why doesn’t this happen when I piss in bleach

5oap10116 ,

It’s diluted

roguetrick ,

Brother if you’re pissing straight ammonia you’ve got other problems. Your body specifically coverts ammonia to urea because it’s toxic to you and it’s usually bacteria that converts it back.

moody ,

It does happen, you just don’t get that much of a reaction because it’s diluted. You definitely don’t want to stick around the fumes that it gives off though.

MeatPilot ,
@MeatPilot@lemmy.world avatar

Sodium Hydroxide, hacksaw, large trash can

PenisDuckCuck9001 , (edited )

In the era of ai and facial recognition, this is the only one so far that seems like it could plausibly get you a knock on the door from law enforcement. Good job.

zigmus64 ,

Gatorade

Pregnancy tests

Plan B

Pacattack57 ,

Even worse:

Gatorade

Pregnancy test

Wire coat hangers

Kolanaki ,
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

Kid’s backpack, kid’s lunchbox, and a gun.

The back to school in America special.

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