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Are antisocial habits keeping you down?

People are painful to me. I find their presence painful. I’ve been this way since infancy. I created a suite of methods for keeping them away (methods like “passive-aggressive hostility”). These methods became deep habits. Later in life I hungered for company and couldn’t figure out why I was so bad at it. I just recently realized what’s up (thanks meditation). Do any of you relate?

SnotFlickerman , (edited )
@SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

I just feel like a loser who is dead weight on everyone else’s life. So I don’t do a good job of keeping in touch with anyone, ever.

I hunger for connection, but I assume everyone else is in the same boat: overworked, underpaid, unable to make time, and already has a boatload of problems, they don’t need one more person who needs support, so why bother wasting their time.

AmbiguousProps ,

I feel the exact same way, and I’m sorry we’re both thinking this way.

sunzu2 ,

Social atomisation of the population is one of the key goal of the regime. They want to break up social connections and make everybody rely on centralized authorities for everything.

They have succeeded at it too.

They overwork us so we have not time or energy for being human.

cosmicrookie ,
@cosmicrookie@lemmy.world avatar

You dont sound antisocial to me

sunzu2 ,

Based on that comment or my work here over all?

cosmicrookie ,
@cosmicrookie@lemmy.world avatar

I am antisocial because i dont like people. Its not keeping me down more or less than other things i am. Its just how it is.

sunzu2 ,

not larping propaganda makes it really hard to communicate within "polite" society

spiderwort OP ,

In the land of the insane, the sane man is considered insane

some_guy ,

Get into therapy. The best time to start was years ago. The next best time to start is now.

I had all kinds of anti-social coping mechanisms. Life was challenging in ways that made me an asshole. I’ve been able to unravel it about 97% and have made huge strides in other areas. I didn’t think I’d ever be where I am today. Do yourself a favor and find someone you trust (it might not be the first therapist you consult) and work on yourself.

lady_maria ,
@lady_maria@lemmy.world avatar

Yeah. I mean, I genuinely do enjoy hanging out with the right kinds people. Occasionally. And for relatively short periods of time. I just have so little social energy and a lot of social anxiety. I find myself frustratingly uninterested in (and/or overwhelmed with) the idea of socializing, not even via text, and I pretty much rely on my SO for making/hanging with friends. So, not great.

I’ve always thought I could get a lot out of meditation, but I’m so bad at sticking to literally anything. Maybe it’s just a self-fulfilling prophecy, but I’ve tried so many things in an attempt to increase socialization or even generally just improving my own life.

I don’t really want to be this antisocial, but making and keeping close friendships seems so daunting and exhausting to me.

intensely_human ,

Yes, I can relate to this. Ask me anything you like.

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