How much do you know about your parent's life around the age you are now?

pohart , 5 months ago

I was there for it. It was a lot like mine, but more optimistic

jeena , 5 months ago

I was still living with them, actually it was nice, they bought a houst just a coupple of years prior and my dad bought his first Mercedes Benz. They were traveling also, even though not as much and far as me now.

LemmyKnowsBest , 5 months ago

I outlived my dad. He committed suicide at the age I was two years ago.

My mom spent age 32-63 paralyzed in a nursing home, so I think I’ve surpassed her life accomplishments at my current age as well.

Tangent5280 , 5 months ago

Why was your mother paralysed?

LemmyKnowsBest , 5 months ago

She had ulcerative colitis, and there were medications she had to take for it but after awhile she stopped taking the meds out of vanity because they had side effects that she thought made her look too “puffy,” next thing I know she was in the hospital after having a stroke that paralyzed her at the age of 32 and she lived another 30 years paralyzed like that.

Tangent5280 , 5 months ago

Wow, sorry to hear that. Terrifying to think we can make one misstep and end up invalid in bed, the rest of our life.

tiredofsametab , 5 months ago

Quite a lot as I was already out on my own when my mom was in her early 40s.

demesisx , 5 months ago

My father was a wage slave like me (working most of his waking week away, working OT on weekends) but at least they already owned a house for twenty years by this age whereas his profiteering generation made sure I’d never own one.

lemmie689 , 5 months ago (edited 5 months ago)

My parents were busy trying to control my fucked up sisters children, with my dad dumping as much responsibilty for child rearing as possible on my mom, and my mom passively aggressively resenting it. Same way me and my sister were raised. My family’s a mess.

Brkdncr , 5 months ago

i know that if they worked hard they could get by.

By worked hard that meant my father, without a college degree, was able to afford:

• A small 3 bedroom house with a yard.
• 2 cars.
• 3rd kid on the way.
• Wife that was nearly bedridden because of said kid.

I don’t think that’s even remotely possible today.

JoMiran , 5 months ago

I outlived my mother almost seven now (meaning that she died at the age I was seven years ago).

My dad was a hot shot lawyer for very questionable clients with a lot of money, but I never really had a relationship with him. Barely know him.

Crackhappy , 5 months ago

I am my father’s image at the same age, except I’m a few inches taller.

shinigamiookamiryuu , 5 months ago

I know infinitely more about my mom than my dad. I know seemingly everything from her job to the places she’d go. Apparently she frequented the Andaman Islands around this time, not an area of the world you’d expect to trace someone to.

ada , 5 months ago

A lot? We were both adults in regular communication!

Sir_Kevin , 5 months ago

They owned a home, car, boat and had two children on one income and no degree. Their health insurance covered everything 100% for the whole family. They went out every weekend and living in Florida, theme parks were the norm.

I bought and moved into an RV after the realization that a house is complete fantasy. I never wanted kids but even if I did it’s out of the question. I silently stress out every time my gf wants us to go to a restaurant because a $15 meal feels like an awful lot right now. My cat is pretty awesome though.

southsamurai , 5 months ago

Well, I’m almost 50, so I was an adult fully my the time my dad hit that mark, and my mom is seven years younger than him.

I actually know a shit ton about both of them at that age, more than they realize. Small town, and the nearest bigger towns are places I’ve worked, and I know a lot of people in the nearest city. So they got up to some things that they don’t know I know lol.

They were divorced by that time range, though my mom didn’t move out immediately. I had moved back in at that point as well, and tended to not be home much just to avoid each other more. This was before I bought the house (family home going back a good ways), and my mom moved out not long after she hit 50, to take care of her aunt in her late stage Alzheimer’s.

Anyway, the area we live in is pretty rural, fairly low population. You really can’t stay in the county and hope to keep things private. With me having been all over the tri-county area between working in home health, and bouncing in the city at some surprising places they didn’t know about, I would hear stories within a day or two. Maybe not the nitty gritty details of all of it, but enough.

Thing is, for similar reasons (everyone knowing everyone in the area), I’ve always had a fairly good idea of what my parents were like at various ages. My dad’s stint in the Army is a section that I only know about from what he’s said, and my mom’s teenage years were a bit murky because she was a navy brat and stayed off the radar of her parents, so all I have is her stories and my aunt’s.

But the rest? I was either there, or know someone that was lol.

PatFussy , 5 months ago (edited 5 months ago)

My older half brother was recently born. Dad was recently a horse farmer studying to be an engineer and mom was a recent HS grad (big age gap). Dad cheated on his ex wife to be with my mom. Unfortunately, there was a lot of violence in central America at this time so they decided to uproot and flee to live in Texas. They lived in a house with 4 families. My brother and I are born. Mom was a bus driver and a house maid, dad washed dishes and delivered newspapers. They only ate top ramen and soup to save every penny they can get to send money back to central america. Family gets involved with MS13, they have to move again and change identity. Luckily they saved enough to live in small town in Arizona. They recently started taking ESL classes so they can fit in but they only spoke spanish. Mom opens up small business selling novelty goods, dad gets good job at a newspaper. For them, everything was work or family at this time of their life. They never went on vacations or went to amusement parks or any of that. They barely ate out. They kept life minimal.

I feel like I have an okay understanding of their life and situation at this age. Everyone here is making stories to show how it’s not possible to live the same life for some reason. My parents story is like the same as every Hispanic immigrant.

scytale , 5 months ago

My mother gave birth to me at the age I am today. I too don’t really know much of what was going on in their lives outside of their interactions with us kids.