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Globulart ,

I will ask if she wants a drink, then request she makes me one too when she says yes.

I never offered to make it, only asked if she WANTED one.

I will then go make her a drink of course, and I’m not sure she’s ever found it funny, but I’m amused.

groupofcrows ,

I no longer say these because of reasons…

“why do we argue so much when we both know you are wrong”?

“if you promise to love me forever then I promise to let you love me forever”.

Her aim has improved alot during this marriage.

cordlesslamp ,

How about your dodging skill? Mine improved a lot.

Recently I’ve developed a new skill called “Catch”, that sure annoyed her even more.

owenfromcanada ,
@owenfromcanada@lemmy.world avatar

Dad jokes. She not-so-secretly loves them, but always likes to give me an eyeroll.

aeki ,

Unprompted, I make a weird “surprise” face that freaks him out for some reason.

nis ,

Intentionally using the wrong ligger/lægger (lie/put down, in danish) in a text to my SO. She lovingly annoyed me back by intentionally not noticing it.

iamhangry ,

Whenever I let out a big fart close to her I say her name out loud in a surprised tone accompanied by “that’s absolutely disgusting!” and she eye rolls immediately lol

EponymousBosh ,
@EponymousBosh@beehaw.org avatar

Mine is finding a picture of an animal with its rear end towards the camera, and then saying “hey, guess what?” to her and when she says “what?” I show her the picture and say “Bunny* butt!”

*or kitty, doggy, etc

PaulSmackage ,
@PaulSmackage@hexbear.net avatar

My wife saw a charcuterie board and under her breath said “charcussy”. I have been repeating that basically every day to her since.

butsbutts ,

oh baby baby

Melatonin OP ,

I think it was there. I can’t imagine leaving it out.

DeltaTangoLima ,
@DeltaTangoLima@reddrefuge.com avatar

Texted my wife to tell her I was heading to a mate’s place for “a dip in the pool and some pizza”, then followed up with a texted stream of consciousness, one line at a time, about how I was planning to eat the pizza - not dip in it, then pondering what dip on pizza would be like, followed be weighing up the pros and cons of about 4 or 5 different dips on pizza, and the different pizzas they might work on.

It took about 7 or 8 messages before I got her eyeroll response. Worth it.

spittingimage ,
@spittingimage@lemmy.world avatar

Not recently, but this is one I’m particularly proud of. She texted me to complain that she was music-less in the office because her MP3 player failed.

Well of course I phoned and was able to sing one line about never giving her up before she hung up the call.

Kecessa ,

I do that with everyone that tells me “I’m going to the bathroom”

I reply with “Good luck! 👍”

pythonoob ,

I usually say “have fun”

Mothra ,
@Mothra@mander.xyz avatar

I say either but my favourite is “may the Force be with you”

Passerby6497 ,

My preferred response has always been “Hope everything comes out ok”

peopleproblems ,

that’s even better

Kecessa ,

Oh wow, that’s good!

los_chill ,

I always go with: “Just pee your pants.”

Panurge987 ,

I like to respond with, “Why? What’s in the bathroom?”

BodePlotHole ,

Inappropriate nicknames. Wait for her to do something slightly embarrassing, make a nickname out of it, then strategically use it in awkward situations.

My current frontrunners are “Whisp-a-doody”, “FUPA-diaper”, and “Dumptruck full o’ dead cows”.

That last one isn’t anything she did, but something we both witnessed that really upset her.

kurcatovium ,

I do at least two things that she pretends to hate, but definitely does not.

  1. When discussing something I always reply this way:
  • Her: Come on, say something.
  • Me: Something.
  1. When she needs to do something in the future:
  • Her: Remind me, that I have to buy milk tomorrow.
  • Me: instantly You know, you have to buy milk tomorrow.
Kecessa , (edited )

That second one followed by “I’ve done my part so don’t forget!”

groupofcrows ,

Wife: Promise you will always listen to me.

Me: I promise to listen but not do what you say.

GrappleHat , (edited )
@GrappleHat@lemmy.ml avatar

I sneak up behind her and give her “tiger rubs”, which is aggressive up & down motion on the ribs & side meat.

She loves it x20 years

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