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lasagna ,
@lasagna@programming.dev avatar

I wouldn’t call it hard per se. I would call most current dating practices a waste of time. It’s a lot like playing the lottery, but instead of money, I pay with my time. And even statistically speaking, the odds are quite bad, for both sides. When you have so many choices every choice seems less worth it. When you have too few choices, competition is fierce. I envy neither men nor women in today’s scene, and I’d expect it to be much more difficult for the LGBT+ community.

I would say two things to you, not necessarily connected.

One, we think the grass is always greener on the other side. When I look back at my partnered life compared to my single life now, I would say my life now is better. After spending time with myself I was finally able to solve loads of internal issues. Relationships can become a very comfortable state and I definitely let myself go too often. I haven’t forgotten that loneliness also occurred while I wasn’t single.

Two, you can make no mistakes and still lose. As Picard said it best, that’s just life. If life isn’t working now, I wouldn’t expect a partner to fix it. After the honeymoon phase, we tend to fall back to our old selves. Use this time to get that self in order and perhaps while you do it you find yourself happier regardless of the outcome of life.

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