Hey, the Bible is totally child friendly. Like that passage where Lot’s daughters get him drunk and have sex with him in order to have his babies.
Or the one that describes how a guy’s brother died without having an heir. So the guy got to have sex with his sister-in-law in order to give her a son. Except he pulled out at the last second and “let his seed spill on the ground” and was killed for breaking his word.
Or maybe the passage where Dinah was raped and her rapist wanted to marry her. Dinah’s brothers agreed, but only if all the men in that village got circumcised. Then, when all the men were “indisposed,” the brothers ran in, killed all the men, and took the women and children captive.