I dated a non-observant Muslim girl who in college who kept my existence a secret because she was terrified of her father finding out she was dating a non-Muslim. Her father was “traditional” basically went to mosque on big holidays. But she was still absolutely madly panicked about him finding out about me.
Things I learned: a lot of ex-Muslims keep calling themselves Muslims because they’re afraid; a lot of “cultural Muslims” exist that are sort of like cultural Catholics — all the guilt, none of the belief; and that there isn’t really “progressive Islam” the way there is “progressive Christianity”—all flavors of modern islam that have enough adherents to matter are fundamentalist, it’s just a matter of degree. There’s no group of consequence that thinks the Koran is just a revered book or thinks that their way is but one of many to connect with the divine, etc.