Cheating is sexual abuse. Anything that does not include noncorerced consent is sexual abuse. It is the partner's emotional, physical health and life at risk.
It's passive aggressive and it is abusive. If that triggers a cheater, perhaps they should seek a therapist.
I am a survivor and thriver after child abuse and domestic abuse. It was once legal to beat wives as long as the stick wasn't bigger around than a thumb. It was abusive. It is legal to emotionally abuse people. It is abusive. Spousal rape was once legal. It is abusive. Owning other humans was once legal. It is abusive.