I think you may have only met some extraordinarily harmful people or you have read too much of the Internet. Go meet a super strict conservative at the table. Shit, go out and make friendly conversation with a white supremacist. People can have awful beliefs for soooo many reasons but they’re still people with all the feelings you keep trying to deny them.
The phobias you mentioned aren’t really about empathy to begin with - a decade ago, they were about fear. Hence the name. And you haven’t admitted to your false claim of me blaming victims.
Quit demonizing swaths of people based on gross generalizations, dude. You’re adding to the bullshit that hurts us all.