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Nacktmull ,
@Nacktmull@lemmy.world avatar

Makes perfect sense. Obviously god is a scientist who created Eve by cloning from cells that he took from Adam’s rib, right?

gvasco ,

Everyone is discussing semantics, and no one is mentioning that the bible creation of the woman was mistranslated and the word that was translated into “rib” actually means something closer to “appendage”, and the only bone that is missing in men is actually the phallic bone when compared to other mammals, men and women have the same number of ribs.

Edit: PS: I don’t actually take the bible’s story seriously but think it’s an interesting and funny fact.

thorbot OP , (edited )

So god took Adam’s boner and made women, got it

bellly ,

Women are made of dick bone

1847953620 ,

I came from my hand.

Omega_Haxors ,

The fucked up thing about that is it was an intentional mistranslation for the sake of mysogyny. In the original bible, Eve was created from Adam’s equal half but some cracker decided nah lets just use an outdated definition so that she came from a small fraction of Adam instead.

It’s like how King James censored everything even remotely approaching critique of monarchy for his funny little hotel bible.

rotopenguin ,
@rotopenguin@infosec.pub avatar

Those two aren’t exclusive.

She in particular looks like she came from a monkey’s rib.

Cylusthevirus ,
@Cylusthevirus@kbin.social avatar

Kinda looks like she came from a McRib tbh.

Gorvin , (edited )

deleted_by_author

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  • OutlierBlue ,

    Monkeys were in that lineage between single celled organisms and you.

    Dkarma ,

    Apes. Not monkeys.

    OutlierBlue ,

    Apes evolved from monkeys. Monkeys are in your lineage.

    EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted , (edited )
    @EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

    You got it backward—monkeys evolved from apes.

    Like this:

    https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/pictrs/image/683008b2-8e91-4ee4-9574-215139ec168a.jpeg


    Edit: I was wrong. See my comment 2 levels below.

    Portosian ,

    Lol, this is also wrong. Replace ape with primate and you’ve got something more accurate. If you actually care about maintaining phyletic groups then apes ( and thus humans) are old world monkeys.

    Gorvin ,

    deleted_by_author

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  • OutlierBlue ,

    Monkeys are a group of animals. Our ancestors come from that group. They are classified as monkeys. All of us had monkey ancestors.

    I think you’re confusing that with the specific species of monkey that are alive today. Those are distant relatives of ours, not ancestors.

    DocBlaze ,

    you came from your dad’s ballsack. science approves.

    bleistift2 ,

    Even non-Christian-nutjobs get this wrong, so let me spell it out: Humans didn’t evolve from apes. Humans evolved with apes from a common ancestor.

    OutlierBlue , (edited )

    Humans are apes. We evolved from them and we are still them.

    Edit: I think you mean to say chimps, not apes. We came from a common ancestor with chimpanzees. We were never chimps.

    rockerface ,

    It’s the same deal as with birds and dinosaurs. Birds didn’t evolve from dinosaurs, they are dinosaurs.

    vaultdweller013 ,

    Y’all are a bunch of hyper-evolved fish, so shut the fuck up and let the superior crabs take over.

    bleistift2 ,

    The Hominidae, whose members are known as the great apes are a taxonomic family of primates that includes […] orangutan[s]; Gorilla[s …]; […] the chimpanzee and the bonobo; and Homo, of which only modern humans (Homo sapiens) remain.

    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hominidae

    Apes [are] collectively [called] Hominoidea […] There are two extant branches of the superfamily Hominoidea: the gibbons […]; and the [great apes …]

    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ape

    You’re right in that humans are apes taxonomically. What I was trying to contradict was the misconception according to which the type of apes we see today got somehow “frozen” evolutionary some time ago, but that some of their descendents evolved to become human.

    Chunk ,

    These pedantic Lemmy nerd fights remind me of how I learned so much on early reddit reading similar arguments.

    Fosheze ,

    In particular humans are the apes with the largest penis size to body size ratio.

    Gormadt ,
    @Gormadt@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

    Not to mention that the rib thing was a deliberate rewording in later translations, if memory serves it was originally “made from half of Adam” or whatever his original name was.

    The “from his rib” thing was put there as a way of basically saying “from creation women were lesser.” So basically politics of the time affecting the message.

    I’ll have to see if I can find a source later.

    Edit: Source

    Son_of_dad ,

    Most of the Bible was edited for political reasons. I’m sure Jesus totally told everyone to follow the law of the land and to give Caesar his taxes without a fuss

    Chunk ,

    There is a History of the Byzantines podcast and it talks about the political maneuvering in the empire and church. They had political parties and each party had separate religious beliefs and that was important for how church doctrine evolved.

    It’s so incredibly political it’s unbelievable. It’s like “I want to be emperor so I will agree to whatever those guys say so I can gain their political support”. And now hundreds of millions of people think that’s the word of God when really it’s the back alley dealings of Justinian.

    EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted ,
    @EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

    Ave, true to Caesar!

    FARTYSHARTBLAST ,
    @FARTYSHARTBLAST@sh.itjust.works avatar

    *ape

    EmperorHenry , (edited )
    @EmperorHenry@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

    The westboro bapsit church people probably came into their own mothers.

    Remember! The same laws that allow me to make fun of them are the same laws that allow them to say what they say.

    Getting rid of free speech means censoring everything YOU like too.

    FUsername ,

    Yum… Circular shapes in family trees!

    SGG ,

    They should just call it the family wreath.

    DocBlaze ,
    11181514 ,

    Nobody here said she can’t say what she said. We’re making fun of her for the dumb stuff she’s saying. But thanks for the reminder I guess?

    Holzkohlen ,

    Making fun of religious nutjobs is my god given right!

    EmperorHenry ,
    @EmperorHenry@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

    People always bitch at me for advocating for free speech.

    If you don’t support the free speech rights of the people you hate the most, then you don’t support free speech.

    boogetyboo ,
    @boogetyboo@aussie.zone avatar

    … But you brought it up?

    EmperorHenry ,
    @EmperorHenry@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

    I did bring up free speech. It matters a lot to me, that’s why.

    boogetyboo ,
    @boogetyboo@aussie.zone avatar

    I think you’re busy having an argument with yourself.

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