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edgemaster72 ,
@edgemaster72@lemmy.world avatar

For me #3 is “why are they being so nice? what are they up to? what do they want? how are they planning to embarass me after earning my trust?” then back in the box.

Omega_Haxors ,

This has “I have a shitty friend group and I’m trying to be a reasonable person but i’m unaware just how much they’re holding me back” energy.

stiephel ,

Care to share what you said? Maybe us internet folk can give you some advice :)

GrayBackgroundMusic OP ,

Thanks, but no. 1) It’d require sooooo much context. 2) It would identify me.

but thanks for the offer.

heavy ,

Everyone says stupid shit sometimes, it’s OK.

As long as it’s not hateful or purposefully hurtful. Learn from it and move on.

GrayBackgroundMusic OP ,

Yeah, but I keep doing it. I’m apparently not learning my lesson.

dohpaz42 ,
@dohpaz42@lemmy.world avatar

To a degree you should always “read the room” and adjust both what you say and how you say. But also you should balance that with being open and honest (especially with yourself) about how you feel. I put my foot in my mouth quite a lot. Some of it is plain ignorance, and sometimes I let my emotions get the better of myself. They’re all learning experiences. But you’re right in thinking that a dog is great company. 😁

GrayBackgroundMusic OP ,

I try. I thought the room read as “you can vulnerable here” but I was wrong.

CreateProblems ,

So there are situations where it wouldn’t be appropriate to be openly vulnerable. Like in the middle of class, standing up and telling everyone your past trauma. That’s not an appropriate time to share.

But if the people you were with just didn’t want you to be open and vulnerable, that’s on the people, not you. It’s better to be surrounded by people who accept you and are willing to hear your truth.

dohpaz42 ,
@dohpaz42@lemmy.world avatar

Hey that’s all you can do: try. Sometimes you’ll get it wrong. It the more you try, the better you’ll get at it. I know that’s a little cliche, but I do believe. Maybe next time start smaller?

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