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not_that_guy05 ,

I’m that guy. I’m the one that rarely likes to be around their family. Always drama, always finger pointing, and always me having to defuse the situation. Feels like work.

Thcdenton ,

I left my family years ago, but its mostly because I’m the fuckup everyone looks down on. Im tired of being lowest in the family.

ILikeBoobies ,

Yeah, she was insane

interdimensionalmeme ,

Maybe she was the only sane one.

ILikeBoobies ,

Unlikely, my other aunt had to raise her kids

brbposting ,

How’d I end up with great family on both sides?! Is this rare :o

NikkiDimes ,

As someone with a great family and many, many friends without, yes, lol

MadBob ,

I began keeping my family at arm’s length after they bullied me to tears after I’d told my sister I thought she was quick to jump to conclusions. I couldn’t believe the logical jumps she was making after I’d said it, and furthermore that no one took my side, and further furthermore that they just kept at it until I cried and didn’t comfort me at all. It’s an emotionally complex position to be in!

Serinus ,

This American Life, Episode 587 - The Perils of Intimacy. Thanks for trying, evil stepmother.

PhlubbaDubba ,

I dunno, that aunt and uncle keep their distance because they’re hard republicans and my family are all at the most conservative capable of existing in a socialist space without fearing being struck down by God

I don’t see myself suddenly becoming only barely not so right wing that it’s only a question if I’m voting for Trump

Got_Bent ,

You guys have families?

EvilEyedPanda ,

Or cousins, they were the “bad children.” I’m so lucky to have had friends

AgentGrimstone ,

My parents made the choice to live farther from the rest of the clan 20 years ago and it was a good decision. Today, everyone over there is at each other’s throats or not on speaking terms. Us on the otherhand, they all love us. Not because we’re great or anything, but because we have zero drama with anyone.

UnculturedSwine ,

I’m that uncle

Edit: I also have that uncle. He’s biracial and I’m queer just to give you an idea.

Agrivar ,

As an Uncle Brian who keeps his distance… I hope my niblings make this realization sooner rather than later.

AnarchistArtificer ,

Auntie Dawn, I realise you’re probably more like me than I realised. Especially because my family probably call me a bitch who’s ashamed of her working class background now too.

BugleFingers ,

My whole family is this way. For the most part we all recognize that you can live your life and not communicate every day, week, or month and still be okay with a person. We are great at picking up where we left off we just all have our own lives and that’s okay.

It still feels strange to me when friends contact their parents daily or weekly and say their parents etc. Get upset for not contacting them frequently enough. I understand that’s the way their relationship works but maybe my family is the odd duck Lmao

Potatos_are_not_friends ,

I’m like that with my extended family.

In my 20s, every time I checked in, it was some drama. Uncle did this to aunt. Cousin went to jail. Dad lost something valuable.

Things I had zero ways of helping since I was hundreds of miles away.

At some point, I stopped and I became a lot happier.

SLVRDRGN ,

That’s great you can have that dynamic with your family and that it’s healthy for all of you. I feel like it’s healthy for me, but my own fam is in the category of “getting upset for not contacting them frequently enough”. It’s like they take it personally that I can live my life but not need to be up to date on every moment of theirs.

That said, I’ve found that the only progress I’ve made is by beginning to draw boundaries and trying to be consistent at keeping them. It’s not a wonderful dynamic, but more distance has certainly made it healthier for me.

grrgyle ,

There’s a balance, and it’ll be different for every family. Mine has gone years with no contact, while my partner is in the weekly camp. As time has gone on I’ve become jealous of her and her relationship to family, and wish I had something at least a little bit closer to that with mine.

But we were all so busy with our own lives that we drifted apart, only more recently coming together now that all the kids are middle aged.

It’s kind of surreal getting to know someone you grew up with, and seeing how we’re all so different.

ellabee ,

for me, it’s seeing how similar we are. I went low contact and moved away almost 20 years ago. getting to know my now-transmasc brother when we’re both adults is wild. he’s dealt with things differently, but despite 8 years age gap and 18 years not talking, we have a lot in common still.

sukhmel ,

That could have been me but my nephews don’t know about me existing, I guess, because I’ve distanced not over being in discord, but just over moving far away and not being willing enough to keep the connection. Sometimes I feel bad about it, but mostly not

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