People who care about me are literally the only reason I’m still here. Not my family though. I have like two really good friends and I’m scared of losing them because I fuck up somehow.
I’m on the other side of that because my friends don’t put in the time investment into the relationship. So I’m currently without any direct “close” friends.
It could be said that I’m doing three same thing by not investing time - and you’d be right. I found myself always scheduling get togethers and such, but when I stopped reaching out (it was exhausting) I didn’t hear a peep.
Kinda done with people overall. I do have a good family framework, so I’m not totally in the dark-but I do miss closet relationships outside of that.
Honestly it’s not that bad yet. I just started having regular suicidal thoughts after years of not having them or not regularly having them.
There were times where I was pretty close but in the end I wanted to know what the future brings and didn’t do it. Basically, realizing that I had a friend whom I can trust saved me.
Just recently I said that I’ve never been happier in my life and now it all comes crashing down on me. I did some stupid and some in high sight fucked up shit. I might go to prison and if that happens I’ll probably do it. It’s not even that bad and I’m just 19 so I’m probably overreacting.
Also: basically all my friend have pretty strong depression and might kill themselves at any moment. I don’t know how I would live with that.
Indictments don’t count for shit without guilty verdicts and seeing the orange asshole behind bars, and I’m not even a doomer about this, I believe it’ll happen, but claiming victory before winning is always folly, just ask Trump.
Not that I disagree but it’s hilarious to see the contortions about how the indictments are no big deal from the “ZoMG Killary’s gonna get indicted any day now” crowd.
I’m not sure you understand what a doomer is. Doomers (as a meme) are people who are incredibly cynical and jaded; who believe that we as a species are fucked, and any attempt to stop it is like an antelope thrashing in the mouth of a lion. This idea isn’t inherently right-wing or left-wing, nor is it specific to any particular country (though it’s probably more common in the left-wing western anglo-sphere). It’s the idea that while it technically might not be too late to reverse course and solve things like wealth inequality, climate change, police brutality, fascism, etc; the fact that the people who benefit from these things are also the ones in power means it’ll never happen. It’ll always be 90% words, 10% action until it truly is too late; at which point they’ll declare that they tried as hard as they could and there’s nothing else to be done.
The people you’re describing aren’t actually doomers, they’re just concern trolls.
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