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How do you get over the fact that not everyone will like you?

It’s obvious and you would be deluded into thinking everyone you interact with likes you.

But how do you feel it?

Context: I’m a course instructor and I get direct reviews on my lessons and around 95% of feedback is positive to very positive.

There’s less than 5% of my reviews that have real negative and non-constructive comments. Things like accusations of being incompetent or unprepared or full of shit, etc. They mention times I had technical difficulties or made a mistake (like giving an incorrect response)

Just by the numbers alone this is a very small minority overall. Yet these comments stick in my head and make me doubt my abilities.

So what are your strategies or ways you drown out this stuff?

Frozyre ,

There's a meme image I once saw that spoke to me.

It went; "Stop trying to be liked by everybody, when you don't even like everybody"

And that's so fucking true for someone such as me. You can't please everyone, so you should stop trying because there's thousands to possibly millions of people out there who simply live that spiteful and bitter lifestyle as their entire persona.

Who matters to me are the people I've personally befriended. It doesn't hurt to co-exist and be kind to those who give it to you.

But everyone else, fuck them.

CanadaPlus , (edited )

Yeah, people are full of shit. The way I approach this is just to try and understand if I’m the asshole (or Hanlon’s razor equivalent), or they are. If it’s their issue, it doesn’t really bother me anymore that they don’t like me, and they’re just an obstacle rather than a peer.

That’s just my experience though. And yeah, written out it sounds kind of harsh, but I’m going to say it’s better than becoming even more of a nervous wreck than I already am.

Hirom ,

These 5% of negative reviews probably has nothing to do with you. There’s always a small amount of people unhappy for random or unrelated reasons (broke up with boy/girlfriend, car broke, etc) and who would write negative reviews no matter what. It’s possible they cannot dissociate the course from other things happening in their life. They just happened to be unhappy at that time, and felt like leaving a nasty review.

Hikermick ,

I prefer to be liked as opposed to being disliked but I take pride when certain people dislike me

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