First Horizon Bank system detects when a call center worker was on the brink of "losing it" and plays an AI-made montage of family photos set to their favorite song to calm them down.

ultratiem , 10 days ago

I’m still pissed they scrapped my idea of sending in a cold slice of pizza cut in half with a card that reads “we love you employee #3891-A” 😡

Xero , 2 days ago

Cold slice of pizza with a randomly placed large hair on it. You’ll be so distracted and lightly stressed out by the hairy cheese plank that your original major stressors will be forgotten.

xia , 6 days ago

This is worse than a boring distopia. This is a “let’s scientifically measure and control the breaking point of humans” level distopia.

stoy , 10 days ago

I would not provide my employer with either photos of my loved ones or my favourite music

Fedizen , 10 days ago

this is just the uncomfortable toilets in reverse.

massive_bereavement , 10 days ago

Wow, this is a great idea for something "Friend Computer" would do in the Paranoia RPG; this community is a gold mine!

Danquebec , 10 days ago

So they’ll show family photos while playing “We shall destroy”?

That would just be weird.

jupyter_rain , 11 days ago

Jokes on them, seeing my family would only stress me more and my favourite music is not calming.

BubbleMonkey , 11 days ago

Jokes on them, I don’t have family and don’t really listen to music.

Checkmate, AI-theists!

Sidhean , 10 days ago

Im stealing AI theist. That’s unreasonably clever

CaptPretentious , 10 days ago

I’m having a hard time processing that’s not from The Onion…

JoMiran , 11 days ago

They gonna braindance choombas that can’t cope with meatspace.

DmMacniel , 11 days ago

But BDs are not just for fondling virtual tits.

pleb_maximus , 11 days ago

There are other things worthwhile?

VindictiveJudge , 10 days ago

They’re technically real tits, it’s just that they’re someone else’s memory of said tits.

Lost_My_Mind , 11 days ago

They’re going to show me pictures of people who I don’t really like, accompanied by metal music that’s probably about killing people, or eating peoples flesh, or snuggling kittens?

InFerNo , 10 days ago

My first thought too

BLOWTORCH SLAUGHTER 🤘

some_guy , 10 days ago

So, Grinfucked, by Devildriver, is one of the songs that’ll play for me. Ok.

Objection , 10 days ago

Wow, this is just like in Severance

Th4tGuyII , 11 days ago

Now this is a boring dystopia -- make a halfarsed attempt to "help" mentally exhausted call workers rather than giving them the power to punish abusive customers or to actually fix whatever corporate-level fuckery made them that way in the first place.

fine_sandy_bottom , 10 days ago

It’s so absurd it doesn’t sound credible?

Like any idiot manager can understand that being shown a photo of your wife and kids after being shouted at by a customer for the nth time today isn’t really going to help.

It’s also incredibly insulting for call centre staff. Imagine encountering real problems with bank policy et cetera and having a computer try to placate you with a nice soothing picture.

queermunist , 11 days ago

https://lemmy.ml/pictrs/image/7fd9e2b5-3e04-405e-a378-daefd002fd08.jpeg

aStonedSanta , 10 days ago

https://lemm.ee/pictrs/image/9dccf3a2-f93f-4c98-9a54-153660f5282f.jpeg

scroll_responsibly , 10 days ago

Is this one of those “corporate wellness programs” we hear so much about?

Phoenix3875 , 10 days ago

I first read “mortgage of the family” and somehow it’s worse.