“I don’t speak the language, you do, but I know better than you what is and is not a slur because every language has to work the same”. Frociaggine is hardly a slur, it’s a term that can be used in many contexts without any particular hateful undertone, although this applies to friendly contexts mostly. “frocio” is closer to a slur because it’s more personal, although in Italian is very common for slurs/bad words to be used in a completely different way too (see for example use of “stronzo”) or without the bad connotation. In Rome this phenomenon is particularly common.
You seem to have a colonialist mindset. Your culture/language apparently has to apply anywhere, no differences accepted.
Also, I am a radical leftist who is a full supporter of LGBTQ rights, and I fight the Church in Italy for decades. So you can put down your strawman.
Calling gaslighting telling you about a word that you don’t understand is the cherry on top :)