Pilots, at least at the upper echelons, have it drilled into them that they are responsible for the aircraft, their actions in it, and those aboard it. I cannot stress the difference between the casual attitude the vast majority of people view their actions behind the wheel with vs the attitude and responsibility of operating a complex commercial aircraft.
Autopilot is a generally necessary convenience for operation of aircraft on long flights, for efficiency, comfort, and preventing fatigue…but it gets turned off instantly should safety require it and conditions warrant it.
In a car? People use it for reading, watching video clips, dozing off if they can get away with it, and letting it drive them right into or cause a wreck.
The problem isn’t necessarily the system (though Tesla’s FSD is full of problems), it’s the fact that drivers are willfully dumbasses with no real understanding of their car’s system and their responsibilities regarding them.