Reading through these comments makes me worry about y’all and maybe the people I interact with on a daily basis.
Like I would understand maybe punching someone to try and “convert” the emotional/mental pain they caused you into actual pain they can understand; to teach them a lesson or open their eyes. Take punching a nazi as an example.
But having “violent sadistic fantasies” especially involving those close to you should probably invoke some level of concern about your mental state and warrant a psych eval.
Put it this way, if you sat down in front of a therapist and told them what you just told us, would they warn the authorities after the appointment or just go about their day?