It’s not a rut to choose a reliable well paid union job over the slim chance of success in a niche art field. That’s common sense. That’s the dream, for many folks.
You’re allowed to feel good about choosing stability and comfort over a high risk plan. You’re also allowed to feel angry that circumstances aren’t letting you follow your dreams more fully. Those are both reasonable feelings.
I feel both of those ways, most days. If things were a little different, I could be living a very different life. Whatever. I choose to meditate on thankfulness for where I am.
I wouldn’t throw away a solid balanced union job life to pursue a career that isn’t going to leave me much time for anything else in life. I explicitly chose not to.
And yeah, I’ve had to make peace with not doing some of the things I would have done in that life. I’ve also done a brunch of things I couldn’t have done it I had pursued that life.
As Dave Ramsey says, “pull that boat closer to the dock before you step off, or you’re going to get dunked in the water”.
By which he means, you can pursue both, and let the better career win. Right now, playing the piano is losing. That’s not a huge shock in the age of digital recordings and abusive record company monopolies.
You can get great at piano in your free time. I know many people who have done so.
I am someone does do their passion as a day job - it made my passion substantially less fun. And I’m still not doing my passion exactly the way my heart wants to, because I have no remaining energy for that after I finish my day job. At the end of the day, any job is still just a job.
Hang in there. If you feel like you’re not playing piano enough, by all means, play more.
But please don’t fall for the trap of believing your passion has to become your day job.
We all need some way to make a living, and we should all pursue our passions. And on the best days we do both on as close to our own terms as possible.
I hope you dont let guilt (or even me!) tell you how often to play your piano, or who for.