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PhlubbaDubba ,

Gossips will tend to respond to outright rejection by gossiping about you instead, and being a man in a predominantly woman’s field is gonna mean that gossip can get very dangerous for you and your career very quickly.

Remember, gossip doesn’t have to be true to still be hot, and scorned gossips will be more than happy to exploit that to the fullest to spite you.

Don’t tell them you don’t care about religion and politics either, because even if you don’t women have learned from shitbags to translate that to “I may or may not have been at the capital on Jan 6th and held a bonfire celebration burning IUDs when Dobbs came down, but I still want to get laid ever.”

My advise, try just being boring. Contribute duds to any conversations they try to involve you in where you’re uncomfortable.

Most importantly speak to a supervisor you feel you can trust to not tell the gossips and tell them the gossip makes you uncomfortable so that if the boring act doesn’t work and they start gossiping on you already, there’s a previous record indicating they might do that and it’ll at least insulate your future career prospects.

As for sex life talk, women are under two impressions, 1, that they aren’t being raunchy when they talk about their sex lives, and 2, that men do it way more and are way grosser about it.

It is entirely possible that they keep bringing up sex lives because they’re trying to relate to you and extravert adopt you, so if you gently explain that you don’t feel comfortable talking about sex with coworkers you might find yourself in a more open conversation about mixed signals and how you all can create a better working relationship.

Some people keep trying to talk to ya because they really do just want to be friends! That sounds obvious but trust me it’s hard to actually internalize that to the point that you can believe it when it’s happening to you. Missed out on chill compsci bonding time with this pretty cool dude named gabe because I didn’t get that he was being so spontaneously friendly to me so much because he’s just a friendly guy. I met tech wiz Ned Flanders and it didn’t register to me for a solid year lol.

You strike me as a bit of an introvert so I’ll add, uncomfortable but tactful conversations now can save you exponentially more awkward and embarrassing ones later.

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