I feel all of that. Debian is painfully slow to bring up-to-date, and all of Arch is neurotic.
You might have a better time with Fedora as they are closest to Wayland, but Fedora is pathologically open source to the point that if there aren’t open source drivers for a thing you’re triple tucked…
Gaming on linux has been, still is, and always will be a struggle. I hope you give it a try again in a year or so. I personally use Debian as my base system, with an Arch VM on CPU and GPU passthrough for work and gaming. You’ll get there eventually! ☺️