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zxqwas ,

You can use those plastic xmas trees as long as you have enough metal ornaments in them.

I recommend metal tinsels because they are easier to ground.

abbadon420 ,

Have you tried a bonary tree? They can grow very fast and are very resistant against digital attacks.

nightwatch_admin ,

Easy, buy a nice second hand microwave, remove any shielding from the rear part. Ask a skilled friend to make it microwave stronger. Put it as close as possible to neighb’s wifi. Switch it on, leave it on, hacking is now fixed.

oo1 ,

Replace beer with piss.

Lifebandit666 ,

Even if you manage to stop the WiFi hack he can still get in to your network through the ethernet ports. He could train an army of ants to pull a wire through a small hole in your wall and attach it to your router.

Just in case, fill all your unused ports with yoghurt. This will drown the ants

Annoyed_Crabby ,

The solution is pretty simple:

Either drink all your beer so he can still none, or turn off your wifi so he can’t hack.

chevy9294 ,

Juat drink all the beer and he will have nothing to steal :)

clover ,

Ah, the age-old wifi-hacking-through-photosynthesis conundrum! But let's not jump to conclusions—perhaps your neighbor just has an insatiable thirst for bandwidth... and possibly your beer.

PenisDuckCuck9001 OP ,

Write a 20000 word essay about the evils of wifi hacking and why morons that hack into your wifi to steal you beer are total losers.

clover ,

20,000 words? I'd rather plant 20,000 trees.

clockwork_octopus ,

If you can find a bear, it might be enough to distract the neighbor, and maybe he’ll share his trees with you

PenisDuckCuck9001 OP ,

I could try to train an army of attack ducks. They say the ducks at the park are free. I know a guy that has 2 pet ducks.

Sanctus ,
@Sanctus@lemmy.world avatar

No, no. You have to line the trees with mirrors to reflect his hacking signals.

PenisDuckCuck9001 OP ,

What if I just dig a moat? Shovels are only $13.

Sanctus ,
@Sanctus@lemmy.world avatar

He’ll just fill it with alligators and wait you out.

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