I’ve never tried lucid dreaming. I’m an insomniac so I’m just chuffed if I manage to get any sleep, let alone control my own universe.
But often when I do dream, I die in my dreams. Usually violently - gunshot or blunt instrument sort of deaths that I’m cowering from prior to. So I’m in genuine terror and horror before my death…And I swear, the millisecond before it happens (and I always wake up at the time of death) I feel the pain of it.
It’s pretty fucked, tbh. I’ve lived a peaceful life with very little violence in it, and guns certainly aren’t a thing here. So I don’t know my brain can’t just chill out.
Anyway - it’s why I’m a little frightened to try lucid dreaming. At least in spite of the fear there’s a sense of inevitability about my deaths in these dreams (i.e. my murderer has found me in my hiding place), somehow I feel like it’d be worse if I was trying and failing to fight back, or if I prolonged the inevitable death by trying to outsmart the person? Or could I just shut down that plot completely?
Thanks for the session, do I just pay the receptionist on the way out or will you just invoice me?