I too press keys in response to pixel patterns on a screen, hoping the presses yield new patterns that look pretty to others.
The syndrome is real. Undiagnosed ADHD until 42 and a hell of a time getting correctly treated thereafter. Im in therapy again because doing so very well after years of anxiety and depression is itself very disorienting.
Just know you aren’t alone in feeling like an imposter sometimes. You are also a survivor and are stronger than you will ever get credit for, unless you grant the credit to yourself!