I’m a bad example. I haven’t properly tuned the settings, currently RAM will grow to whatever is available.
I’m very lucky, the instance is running in a proxmox container alongside some other fediverse servers (run by others), on dedicated hardware in a datacentre. The sysadmin has basically thrown me plenty of spare resources since the other containers aren’t using them and RAM not used is wasted, so I’ve got 32GB allocated currently. I still need to restart once a week or that RAM gets used up and the database container crashes.
It’s been on my list of things to do for a while, try some different postgres configs, but I just haven’t got around to it.
I know a couple of months back lemmy.world were restarting every 30 mins so they didn’t use up all the RAM and crash. I presume some time and some lemmy updates later that’s no longer the case.
I know some smaller servers get away with 2gb of RAM, and we should be able to use a lot less than 32GB if I actually try to tune the postgres config.