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oxjox ,
@oxjox@lemmy.ml avatar

From what I’m reading, it seems more like you’re on the spectrum more than simply being introverted.

And what you believe to be introverted is more likely shyness and insecurity. Introverted is an overused word that has lost its original meaning. An introvert is someone who finds comfort and energy in doing isolated things. An introvert doesn’t explicitly have issues with socializing with people one-on-one or in small groups. You may in fact be both but you have not described introversion here.

I have a friend like you I’ve known for about ten years. At first, and pretty much until recently, he was very robotic and acted as if he were carrying out instructions he read about being a normal human. After enough time of faking it though, he’s more natural in his interactions - though still awkward.

So, my advice is to try acting like a normal person while slowly exceeding the restrictions your insecurity permits. Don’t expect others to willfully engage with you right away - they too may suffer from what holds you back. I would venture to guess, given how social interaction has changed in the last twenty years, most people are more similar to you than not.

Seems like you’re on the right path so far by introducing yourself. Don’t be a dick. Don’t be pushy or clingy. Relationships and trust take time to build. Give it room to breathe.

Try to find new hobbies that promote in-person out-in-the-open social interaction and build your confidence around others you share common interests with. This will help build your confidence around others like your coworkers.

Also, know yourself and your place. There might be something about you that people generally aren’t comfortable with. Being too anxious to form relationships could be one. Maybe you need to work on your hygiene or maybe word got out that you stole someone’s lunch or maybe someone heard you taking a massive dump one day or maybe they found out about your political or religious positions or they resent you for being hired for some reason. It might be something other than you being shy and insecure.

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