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Ex-Facebook Users, What Do You Use Now?

I joined Facebook years ago not long after it took off from its college roots. I also quit it years ago when my feed became full of junk.

The one thing I miss is contact with my friends, family, and ex-cowokers. Most of them weren’t technically inclined so that was the only platform they were on. Some of them did move to Instagram, which I did as well until Facebook bought it.

I then tried wt.social shortly after it started up. It seemed like a great alternative, but its growth is very slow, It has 450,000 users according to wikipedia. Now there’s a version 2, Trust Cafe. The same article also mentioned that they’re looking into connecting to ActivityPub.

What do you use in place of Facebook to stay in contact with friends and family? Mainly, I just use text messaging apps. I use Lemmy and Mastodon for news and information.

gingerrich ,

Nothing. Out of all the ‘friends’ I had on there, only a handful were ones that are irl mates and I have their numbers. We text occaisionally.

zergling_man ,

They can come visit me if they have something to say. Or email. I’ve invited them to XMPP and fedi many times and they’ve ignored it. I interpret this as them not wanting to talk to me.

Gutotito ,
@Gutotito@kbin.social avatar

Pretty much just this. Well, and LinkedIn, but I don't post personal stuff over there. I moved from Facebook to Reddit about eight or nine years ago, and with Reddit circling the drain, am currently rudderless. Tried this Mastodon thing when it first got popular a few years ago and had no good experiences with it; this time around seems to be different with all the fresh blood. Just hope it keeps on keepin' on .

Christa ,

I got into Facebook pretty late (around 2010) and it never grabbed me. I caught up with old friends, but the window into their lives that it provided me with just made them seem annoying. I fiddled with it for a bit and then switched to Google Plus for the brief window between it coming up and Google sucking all of the joy out of it. After that, it was Twitter and then Mastodon around five years back.

As for keeping up with friends and family, it’s mostly email, phone, and the occasional Signal group chat.

s_s ,

My grandmas and I are pen pals. I text my parents.

I got on facebook to meet girls at university, not to keep up with family. I slowly got off facebook when my friends from university quit posting anything useful.

My other sort of anonymous social media stuff was on reddit and now Lemmy.

heliodorh ,
@heliodorh@beehaw.org avatar

Signal. We just have a group chat. No idea what the extended family is up to anymore though.

drwho ,
@drwho@beehaw.org avatar

Same.

NaoPb ,

Basically this place. I got fed up with all the negativity on Facebook and how everything is about interaction and not positivity. Facebook and other (social) media thrive on getting people agitated because that gets the most views on their ads. However it is slowly setting up humankind against each other and killing us.

ellabella ,
@ellabella@beehaw.org avatar
  • Discord with irl and online friends
  • Twitter for fandom stuff and random opinions
  • Real Life dates with close friends
curt OP ,

Other than a couple of recommendations for Friendica, it looks like everyone hasn’t bothered to find a replacement that does all the same things.

Friending all your relatives on Facebook was like attending a family reunion that never ends. At first, it was great catching up with everyone you hadn’t been in contact with. Pretty soon after that, Uncle Bert would start on some political rant, Cousin Stan would try to get you to invest in some sketchy startup, and Cousin Sally would go on about a new cult she joined. The same thing would hold for an endless high reunion.

Facebook made sense for its original membership of college students. It was a great way to meet other students. You all had similar goals, experiences, and questions. Once you graduated, you all went your own way.

Social media is in its infancy in regards to how we use it. We’re still learning about what works and what doesn’t. For many of us, Facebook doesn’t, more selective, less overall encompassing communication does. It’s probably why we’re all here on Lemmy and Mastodon.

omarciddo ,

Most of the friends I’m still in touch with are on Instagram, though relatively few post frequently anymore. Just a place to send random memes back and forth.

GhostMagician ,

Text messaging apps for one on one or group chats. Lot of my friends use discord and set up a channel just got us for when playing games or watching shows together.

I don’t use any type social media where people are actively encouraged to associate their real identity with and share personal photos or videos on a public feed.

Tubulous ,

Same as you. SMS and phone for most, email and phone for my older relatives. Lemmy and Mastodon for news and information. I have gotten some friends and coworkers to use Signal Messenger, but really, I am kind of done trying to convince people to change their habits. I do feel left out of some conversations that I know happen on Facebook and Apple iMessage, but not really worth “the extras” of having those accounts.

TheyHaveNoName ,

I quit it years ago (I think almost 7 years or so). The thing is I didn’t really look for a replacement. I realised that I wasn’t really keeping in touch with loved ones as much as I was looking at the heavily curated feeds showing me how “perfect” their lives were. The worst thing about this is I could look at a post from a cousin or friend showing me their kitchen remodel or their beautiful holiday pics and meanwhile the gossip from my family contacts told me what was actually going on (but they had maxed out their credit cards for the remodel and holiday couple were actually in the middle of a divorce). Rather than trying to get my family and friends to be more truthful I decided to give my sanity a a time to recover.

FlashMobOfOne ,
@FlashMobOfOne@beehaw.org avatar

Nothing.

I hate Facebook. I spent most of my time on Twitter until Elon Musk pulled that stupid stunt with the sink, then I moved to Mastodon, which I love.

HowlsSophie ,

Nothing. I never stayed in contact with people and regularly downsized my friend list. I found that I was keeping people as friends but hadn’t talked to or messaged them in years. People I actually talk to have my number and I have theirs. Scrolling through people’s lives kept me from reaching out and having real conversations with people so…yeah.

lemmyatom ,

This. Ever since I quit facebook, I find myself reaching out to friends who I care about rather than just following their feed. I also find when we hang out, there’s more for us to discuss and we cherish each other’s company more because we no longer have the convenience of staying hyper updated about each other. It’s the whole idea of absence makes the heart grow fonder. My advice to everyone is to stop relying on social media to keep up with people and go have some real relationships with those you care about. You’ll find yourself much happier.

HowlsSophie ,

Exactly. I remember I used to try to have the most “friends” possible but at some point it was like “yeah I don’t actually talk to these people and I don’t think I will.” Used to also keep FB for certain groups I was part of but in the end, there was just no point.

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