I agree with you, but using Final Fantasy XIV is a weak example. Steam is one of the smallest platforms it’s on, with most PC players using the non-steam launcher.
As an MMO, it also has the benefit of players being able to see a ton of other people when they log in and the fan base talks about it enough that you never get that “whatever happened to that game” feeling.
Honestly, I think it’s that last thing that drives most of the dead game talk. Some games come out with tons of hype and then you stop hearing about it as much. Instead of looking up what’s going on, people just assume it flopped and no one plays anymore. Or it’s a game they wish had failed and by saying dead game they are trying to will that belief into existence, depends on the context.