People can have multiple personalities, not as in a mental condition, but as in that you’re a different person at work than who you are at your parent’s. Rapist are also like that. Rapists aten’t rapists 24/7. Sometimes they can be just nice people. That doesn’t make it right, but that does make that you can’t judge someone for not knowing that a coworker or even a friend was a rapist all this time.