I read the first word as “I” instead of “They”. I thought you were saying you had a coffee table or something in your house with a bunch of candy calanders, and calanders with alcohol. Which I wasn’t sure how that would work. It’s not like you can open the flap for the 3rd, and pull out a 12 pack of beer.
So my assumption is you open the flap, and it just says “Get drunk”.
So I’m just over here thinking you’re a diabetic alcoholic.