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@Assman@sh.itjust.works cover

Asses to asses, butts to butts

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Assman ,
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Americans would rather see 40 Haitians die in a boat fire than see one at the grocery store

Assman ,
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For the snails: a guy in the crowd at a trump rally got struck by a bullet

Assman ,
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Enough to make my son one sandwich

Assman ,
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When you buy riot gear at harbor frieght

Assman ,
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I’m just gonna see how real y’all are: I hope he drops out because of it

Assman ,
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Of course, that’s where all the Nazis are hiding

Assman ,
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He literally said “take the guns, then do process [sic]” years ago

Assman ,
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You try taking your shirt off without arms

Assman ,
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When you can’t decide between golfing and the batting cages

TIL the term Redneck likely originated from the sunburned red neck of those working in fields. (en.wikipedia.org)

The term originally characterized farmers that had a red neck, caused by sunburn from long hours working in the fields. A citation from 1893 provides a definition as “poorer inhabitants of the rural districts … men who work in the field, as a matter of course, generally have their skin stained red and burnt by the sun, and...

Assman ,
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Sun on the other hand…

Assman ,
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Grew up surrounded by pink farmers, can confirm

Assman ,
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There’s a mass extension event every 100 million years.

Assman ,
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My Kevin Bacon number is two. I know a guy who was an extra in tremors. I have no other achievements in life, so this will have to do.

Assman ,
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That’s what I keep telling people

Assman ,
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Blowing people up isn’t cool, but pursuing a primitive lifestyle? Gotta say, that’s pretty cool.

Assman ,
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Well they drew those funny shapes on the front

Assman ,
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Probably won’t be a teleprompter at this interview

Assman ,
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“that won’t stop me because I can’t read”

  • Lauren Boebert

After Supreme Court immunity ruling, Biden draws sharp contrast with Trump on obeying rule of law (apnews.com)

President Joe Biden warned Monday that a Supreme Court ruling granting presidents broad immunity from prosecutionwould make an unchecked Republican Donald Trump “more emboldened to do whatever he wants” if he regains the White House in November’s election....

Assman ,
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We’re gonna have to put laaaaaaaadybird down… Mr Hill?

Assman ,
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Why couldn’t she be the other kind of mermaid!? With the fish part on top and the lady part on the bottom?

Assman ,
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I’m into it

Assman ,
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Even old New York was once New Amsterdam

Assman ,
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People just liked it better that way

Assman ,
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He specifically asked for that

Assman ,
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Her jawline is unbelievable. She’s like a more beautiful thwomp from mario

Assman ,
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What are you saving your enter key for? Let’s see some paragraphs dawg

Assman ,
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bury the ledge

Do you mean bury the lede?

Assman ,
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Hey I’m not an addict. I can stop having a good time whenever I want.

Assman ,
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Back in my day you could turn on the computer and operate it without anyone knowing. Our “internet connection” was demonic screeching from hell on the telephone and you didn’t need it to play solitaire.

Assman ,
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There isn’t a soul on lemmy that doesn’t know Linux exists

Assman ,
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Worst case scenario, you don’t have to work tomorrow

Assman ,
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White people who decided only white people eat potato salad

Assman ,
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Probably saw him fuck up a coyote and said, let’s stick with this guy

Assman ,
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Homie there are pizza flavored ones

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