Jesus could have been an antique meme à la Chuck Norris that got waaaay out of hand

trustnoone , 7 hours ago

This is actually what i sorta believe. Thats jesus was just a smart guy amongst stupid people.

Like people be all dirty and getting the plague and hes like “bruh go wash youself in the river, you dirty as fuck, thats why you keep getting sick”.

Then next minute they get better and theyre all like “omggggg the messiahhhh”

InvertedParallax , 7 hours ago

E’s not the messiah, e’s a very naughty boy!!!

Valmond , 3 hours ago

But a narcissistic one. He did believe he was the son of the fucking god lol.

aniki , 2 hours ago

But Jesus didn’t write the bible, it was mostly written over a hundred years after the fact. I believe Mathew is the closest at 80 years and John was 300 years later. We have no way of knowing whether Jesus actually did say anything of the sort. The Nicean Council was mostly a political one so Constantine could solidify his power by utilizing the top heavy hierarchy of a fledgling branch of Christianity.

We only have the Nag Hammadi library because of “heretics” preserving it in secret.

beliquititious , 6 hours ago

I always thought of prophets as particularly charismatic mentally ill people. Jesus may not have set out to start a cult, but like, delusions of grandeur and distorted self-image in someone charismatic and intelligent usually ends in a cult. In his lifetime they were basically anarchist hippies (at least as recorded by the bible), but like all cults, today the center has rotted and it’s just toxic brainwashing.

ivanafterall , 3 hours ago

The “prophet” Isaiah is a good example:

Isaiah 20:1-4

1 In the year that Tartan came unto Ashdod, (when Sargon the king of Assyria sent him,) and fought against Ashdod, and took it;

2 At the same time spake the Lord by Isaiah the son of Amoz, saying, Go and loose the sackcloth from off thy loins, and put off thy shoe from thy foot. And he did so, walking naked and barefoot.

3 And the Lord said, Like as my servant Isaiah hath walked naked and barefoot three years for a sign and wonder upon Egypt and upon Ethiopia;

4 So shall the king of Assyria lead away the Egyptians prisoners, and the Ethiopians captives, young and old, naked and barefoot, even with their buttocks uncovered, to the shame of Egypt.

smokebuddy , 6 hours ago

Probably the most entertaining part of Mortal Engines was a scene from the museum of history where they revealed the Minions to be some kind of revered ancient deity

BackOnMyBS , 1 hour ago

The thing is that while Jesus could walk on water, Chuck Norris could swim thru land. Which one is more impressive?